Dark Angels
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Codex Unforgiven  


Fallen - 2006/03/15 08:02 This thread discusses the Content article: Fallen

An outstanding story, Belial. Can't wait until it's finished.
With the right revolting piety of tone
The word "Freedom"
Can make you want to lock yourself
In a deep dark dungeon
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Re:Fallen - 2006/03/18 13:14 ok ive read most of it and really this story needs alot of polishing and quite a few changes. Its a good concept but the lack of proofreading and also quite a few of the things in the story go against the background.

If the author wants to, ill be glad to help him polish this stroy so its of a high standard.
Brother Xeres Signing out
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Re:Fallen - 2006/03/20 09:01 Go right ahead. I am always in search of good constructive criticism. I've been trying to finish it and haven't really gone back to proof read much.
The Fortress of the Unforgiven
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Re:Fallen - 2006/03/20 12:10 Nice belial, ill start this holy task today.

//Space marine version//
"IT SHALL BE DONE BROTHER!"
Brother Xeres Signing out
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Re:Fallen - 2006/04/06 07:40 Hi

Just one question for the background of this Text.

Did the Dark Angel Legion Recruit (train) Librarians before the Horus Heresy. I no how did these fallen had a Brother Librarian. (From the Novel : Angel of Darkness u get the idea that Librarians did not exist during the hours heresy. Or That The main character of the novel DISLIKES the Librarians, I agree with The second Scenario )

Some Help in this?

P.S. The TEXT is fantastic
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Re:Fallen - 2006/04/10 09:07 When I read the IA articles of the Chapters (good and bad) there is mention of psykers within the legions. The Thousand Sons had an abnormal quantity of them. This led me to believe that they did exist in all the Legions and used the same ranking that is used today.

As to the Character conflict between Leliel and Uwala. Leliel is meant to be a typical Fallen that has gone bad. He's a mercenary and is being pulled toward the worship of the blood god. Uwala in contrast, was loyal to the Emperor and saw the benefit of the Great Crusade for humanity. He used his powers to sense out the Fallen that were honorable to offset the influx of Fallen created by Cypher's little knack for calling out the Fallen.

That is my reasoning for the large numbers of Fallen. Cypher pulled the Fallen members of the Angelus Conturbo together through his subtle ability noted in the fluff. Cypher got saved by his mysterious benefactor but the rest of the Fallen were left behind. Since then Leliel has led them in his own way. Uwala accepted Cypher's leadership, but not Leliel's. Thus the rift.

Now Uwala is dead, but Leviticus has taken up the cause and is now beginning to taken on Leliel.

The Fortress of the Unforgiven
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Re:Fallen - 2007/05/19 12:59 I thoroughly enjoyed this story and I cannot wait to see how Leviticus and his squad tackles the others.

Good job.
"War Is Not About Dying For Your Country....Its About Making The Enemy Die For Theirs"
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